What if your engagement ring is ugly

The symbolism of an engagement ring may also be behind the superstition. When another person wears the ring, she changes that symbolism and inserts herself in the relationship.

In time, this feeling may have become a superstition. Although rare, engagement ring mishaps can be emotionally devastating. When you let someone else try on a ring, you are releasing control over this sentimentally and financially valuable piece of jewellery. Next time someone asks to wear your ring or suggests you try hers, explain that you want to keep things positive during this special time. Many superstitions have their roots in faith.

Some are no more than common sense, and some are downright baffling. But, despite that, plenty of people do believe in them. How many times do you see ballplayers who need to put the same shoe on first before every game? Or people who need to salute three times if they see a single magpie on its own? Like we said, baffling. Superstitions are the type of thing which we pick and choose whether to believe. We might walk under a ladder one day, but spill salt without a second thought the next.

No, there are. Not your wedding day, or even the day of the engagement, but the day you buy the ring. A curious American superstition is that the day on which you buy the ring will dictate your future.

Friday the 13th, perhaps? Buying on a Monday will cause the buyer to lead a busy life, so make your mind up on that! This one is probably little more than an excuse not to let anyone else wear it, and we do understand that. An engagement ring is an intensely personal thing. The third finger of the left hand is, at least in most western cultures, the only choice to wear both wedding and engagement rings.

Superstition says that the Vena Amoris vein of love connects this finger directly to the heart. Could it be that the ancient Romans with whom it started just knew a marketing hook when they saw one? If an engagement ring is loose, it will be a bad omen for the relationship. Of course, the real bad luck with a loose call is that you might lose it somewhere along the way. This is probably one of those that go more towards common sense than superstition. Three stone engagement rings are very much in the news in , thanks to Prince Harry.

When he proposed to Meghan Markle, he did so with a ring containing 3 diamonds. The 3 diamonds represent the past, present and future, with the superstition telling us that to lose one would be devastating for the wearer.

To take off an engagement ring means it was never meant to be worn and would bring terminal bad luck. We do see an awful lot of women who have perfected the art of moving the ring from one finger to another without ever losing skin contact, though. Not everyone has an engagement ring. If you only wear a wedding band , almost all of the same rules apply.

Wedding bands are often made from a variety of materials, including platinum, sterling silver, tungsten, wood and even diamonds. No matter the kind you have, avoid exposing your wedding band to harsh chemicals, soaps and beauty products.

When my husband's mother knew we were serious about each other after four years of dating, she called me to ask if I would consider a family heirloom. I was honored, but terrified. What if it was ugly and not my style? I would have had a really hard time telling my mother-in-law 'no' because I hate to hurt anyone's feelings.

She showed me three rings, and of the three — two of which really weren't my style — I chose my engagement ring, which belonged to my husband's great aunt Peg. I was disappointed that the center diamond on my ring wasn't larger and that the appearance of the ring was circular and flat, as opposed to one sparkly diamond standing up on prongs. I had always envisioned a big round-cut center stone, grabbing attention in a platinum band.

Instead, I had a. My husband is two years younger than me, and told me that once we were more established and older, I could upgrade if I wanted to. We were saving a lot of money by not buying the ring. But, over time, I truly fell in love with my ring. I've long been fascinated by the Victorian time period, so when I learned my ring was from , that was the icing on the cake. I feel close to my mother-in-law knowing that she wanted me to have it, and not many people get to say their ring is a family heirloom.

I thought one day I would want to upgrade to a larger ring, but I wouldn't want to alter the history of the stone, which is such a unique and beautiful design. Also, this ring is the one he proposed to me with, and it symbolizes our ten years together. I could have asked for a bigger ring, but I'd so much rather spend that money on a family vacation making memories. It was yellow gold with a small, cloudy marquis diamond in the center and turquoise pieces down both sides — plus one bonus piece of red coral.

He bought it off a friend in a motorcycle club who needed the money. At the end of the day, your MO when you're in this situation shouldn't be based on what these other people did. No, it should be what's right for your relationship. By Candice Jalili. Openly discuss what you want beforehand.

Be honest if you don't like the one you're given. I spoke up. We went together to the jeweler with the intention of looking things over, and actually chose a traditional type of setting for mine single diamond in a simple setting.

After we bought it, I couldn't stop thinking about how showy it felt, and how unlike the two of us it seemed. I couldn't connect to it.

So we called the store, asked to return it and choose something different, which they kindly allowed. We found the perfect thing on our second trip. Talk about it as a team and come up with some affordable options. It's no big deal if it isn't your style. I would tell him so. He showed me a picture of my heirloom ring before committing to giving it to me to his mom. You need to be able to have uncomfortable conversations with the person you're marrying. Talk to him.

It would be hard, but if you aren't comfortable discussing uncomfortable things with someone, you may want to rethink marrying them. Oh God, I have no idea what I would do. When I was in relationships that I thought would lead to marriage, I made sure that the man had examples of things that I liked.

One guy used those examples to buy me a very nice pair of earrings; another would search for things online and say "What are your thoughts on this? My best friend wanted her ring to be a surprise but also did not trust her now-husband to pick it out - apparently he'd made VERY questionable choices in the past. She still got to be surprised by the ring and he knew that she would like it in advance.

Maybe it's not that big of a deal, after all. In long term relationships I make a point of discussing the type of rings I like and other similar gift items to make it easier. Assuming I said yes, I would however then have a discussion with them a bit later about how I wasn't so keen on the ring and propose HA that we go and choose a new one together and if necessary, make it clear I'd expect to bear some of the costs.

If it was a ring handed down ie not able to be returned I would at some point talk to them about my intention to wear just a wedding band Also because of my tenancy to take jewellery off.